End chapter in the book of 2013

 

As I look back at the past year so many things rush to my mind. To put it all in words would take a million years. So I will do my best to summarize my year and let you know my goals for this coming year.

This year had its ups and downs. I have come to the conclusion all things will come and end in its own time. You have to be open to change, open your heart to let it all in. I, for so many years, closed my mind and thought to possibilities within my reach. I prided on my positive attitude in life, but as soon as I felt someone wasn't doing me right, my positive attitude went right out the window.

In this search of losing weight, I've also unknowingly, found a piece of me I loss. The ability to really step back and know all things happen for a reason and I'm not in control of it, but I'm in control on how it makes me feel and respond.

As soon as I was able to let go of control and just enjoy living, I found that I'm able to be happy, without feeling like I'm hurting others by being happy. I can lose weight and enjoy the rewards of being smaller. I don't have to keep this weight on because it makes someone else unhappy and miserable about themselves. We are worthy of feeling and enjoying happiness. As long as I live, I will never forget the lesion, this year has taught me.

How will I apply this to the coming year? I will make sure in all that I do, I bring and enjoy happiness. It sounds crazy and radical, but I truly believe that happiness is a choice to chose to be or not to be period! Energy in your own being is so strong it can and will move mountains. You have to just believe!

Here is the list of runs I did this year:

Glow run 5k
Octoberfest run 5k
Grand Haven Turkey trot run 5k
Whoville run 5k
Virtual run 5k

I have these 7 runs planned for the coming year:

Winter blast
Tulip time
Kick-off to summer
Girls on the run
Coast guard
Glowtime
Whoville

 In my goal to hit 50 by my 50th birthday, I will do my best to stay on track, not let anything detour my intent. I WILL SUCCEED!

Sending good vibes, and best wishes, from my page to yours!
Shawn Duncan

One foot in front of the other...keep on swimming....

This past month has been a trip and a half! As you can see by my pics, I have had some progression in the firming up department. Hours of running, sit ups, weights, etc. paid off. I really didn't realize it until I looked at the 2 pics side by side. I was shocked at how far down my belly has gone. I wore the same exact stuff so I can start seeing my progression, my shorts look totally different, was very awesome to see :)

I completed the diet bet and squeezed on by with a grand total of 8 lbs. gone in a month, and by how these pictures look side by side I'm sure it was all fat!
I joined another diet bet and I will also do another before and after pic. I plan on doing these bets until I'm at goal weight, keeps me accountable when $$ is involved.

I learned this past month that I can do anything I put my mind to, I always give great advise and I'm finally taking my own. I have overcome many obstacles to be able to put me first and I'm finally feeling worthy enough to do this. I thank my wonderful wife for always encouraging me to put me first and work on making myself happy. I'm blessed to have the support system I need now, time to utilize them!

Don't ever give up I know I wont!!

My workouts this past week I completed:

 

9-25-13

Jillian I-fit 20 min level 1-incline 4

30 sit ups

30 crunches

15/15 step up

 

9-28-13

5k in 38:55, this was my 5th 5k!! I have 45 to go to make my 50 by 50 :)

 

9-30-13

Jillian I-fit 20 min level 1-incline 9

weights:

60-arms, 60-legs, 30 abs

 

Goal for this coming week:

 

make good food choices

track, track, and track some more, 1 serving = measure, measure, measure!!

workout 5 times no matter what!!

 

 

My inspiration for this coming week:

 

 

Day 1 of 30 day challenge

 

So today is day one of tracking on this new challenge. I forgot how I hated tracking calories. I hate the adding etc., it is just daunting. I have to say this will be one hard 30 days. Bonus though is the possibility to win some cash!

I entered the Diet Bet and so far the bet is over $11,000.00 wow! I'm excited and pumped. I'm just not all that excited about the food tracking. I hate it, but have come to the conclusion this is what I must do to stop this vicious cycle of yo-yo dieting. I need to learn how to balance my foods and not go all gun-ho on plans I have learned about. It is causing me to have a real full blown eating disorder.

So my plan for next month is kick ass in the food department so it matches my workouts.

 

My workouts this past week I completed:

none took a week off after my race (by the way was super fun)

 

Goal for this coming week:

Track, track, track, O yeah track some more....

 

My inspiration for this coming week:

$11,500in the pot

Another goal!

 

At the beginning of the year everyone always gets on the weight loss band wagon. Some fall off and some complete the goal of losing the lbs. they wanted.

I started out like many, wanting to make sure I made this the year, the year I would get fit. So like many others I ate good, exercised my butt off and the lbs. started dropping. Then by mid March the excuses started setting in, the feeling of "I want to lose weight" faded away. I stared gaining my lbs., slowly back, then I realized dam it is June already and I haven't made any process, I'm not sure why I was surprised with how I was eating. This birthday party, that special occasion, so many excuses.

So with renewed spirit of weight-loss I vow again to myself to be the best shape of m life by Jan 1st 2014!

This past week I have been doing ok in the food department. I still have issues with sweets. They are hard for me, it seems worse now I'm on steroids for my asthma. I will not give up, I will not give in or quit! I did manage to lose 1 lb. this past week. How?? Not sure, you got me?? Seems the times I don't watch what I eat is the time I lose, go figure!

 

My workouts this past week I completed:

1 mile run

2 mile run

1 mile run

 

Goal for this coming week:

Drink and eat less sugary stuff eat more veggies

 

My inspiration for this coming week:

 

Another one bites the dust....a week that is, no lbs.

So this last week was a dozy, I ended up gaining over 2 lbs. !!

I tried following these fad diets, these so called best for weight-loss diets and none of them have lasting results for me. I have been craving tons of sugar, my sweet tooth is at large! So I need to get this under control.

I'm in the same position I started back in January! I let the struggles of life get the better of me and I did not put me first. Not to say I didn't try a lot, I have to say its been a lot more than years before. I just give up so quick and feel like all this is for nothing some times.

 Last night I had awoken to the most awful pain in my throat, why do I do this to myself? It was 4am and I was throwing up my guts, again I have eaten something before bed that was horrid on my tummy in the middle of the night. My bodies reaction = throw up this shi! This is the second time in a week I have gotten sick because I indulged on foods I shouldn't.

It is a viscous cycle of eat good foods during the day, binge at night. I'm on a roller coaster going no where but a full circle of deprivation and binges. I'm in full blown eating disorder! I need to get off this and just live to be happy. I cant let the fear of the unknown lead me back to the place I'm comforted with. What I mean by this is fear will lead me away from being fit because the fear of being fit will lead to I don't know??? I'm comfortable with being fat because I have no expectations of me and of myself so I stay in that mode. Some times to get where we need to be we need to be uncomfortable!

 I cant let food control my every thought and waking moment. I cant always be in a frenzy asking myself, is this food good for me, is this Paleo enough, is this carb ok with this protein. I just need to find a healthy balance for my body. Not what is good for others I don't even know. So this week my goal is to not worry about this fad diet or that one. I will make and tweak my own. I will start a log and see the progression this next week.

 

My workouts this past week I completed:

miles ran week total = 11.477

Have to get back to cross training but was kind of lazy this past week

 

My Goal for this week =

Make a healthy balance in life for myself

 

My inspiration for this coming week:

 

 

 

 

The power of food!

I can not believe we are in August! I have had such a revelation today when I woke up so sick. I wasn't sick from the flu or cold. I was sick because I ate so many things that wasn't good for me. I'm not sure why I turn to food for comfort when it only gives comfort in a minimal way? I seem to forget real easy how I feel after I eat bad things. I was watching my fav show, Extreme weigh loss, and low and behold it was showing what happens to your body when you eat bad things. It was like the show was talking to me.

So going into the 8th month of the year and I'm stuck in the same position I was several months ago. It makes me mad, sad, pissed off, etc. I just want to have a good relationship with food, and I will keep searching for the answer to my questions, I will never ever give up!

My goal for this week:
Eat whole foods. If I complete 6 days, I get reward meal on 7th day.

Promise to self this week:
Step back and really watch the triggers because I'm worth it!

Motivation for this week:
To show my kids with hard work all things are possible!

My workouts this past week:
4 mile run
Pilate's DVD 30 min
super sculpting DVD  30 min
calorie buster DVD 45 min

My weight loss this past week :
.8th of a lb.

Onto a new healthy, Happy week!!

Never give up!

Some days I just want to give up! I get so frustrated!! I have all the answers but don't apply them to get the results I want. I had a gain this week and wasn't a good feeling, but last night while I ate those chips and had a sandwich It was running through  my mind the whole time, Shawn this isn't going to be come weigh-in tomorrow, but I chose to go ahead and just eat. I just gave up in that moment, I didn't want to give a crap, I just felt like I needed salt.
During the day I set myself up for failure. I had a busy day, started off good, had awesome healthy breakfast, worked out hard, and enjoyed the morning. Then came after noon, I had bills to pay and places to be, I got ran around from one of them and ended up missing a meal. I did want to stop and eat at fast food place, but talked myself out of it. I went to the store to return a item and thought I would get some seaweed salad and have a quick meal on the road. I patted myself on my back, I didn't cave in and eat junk, believe me it was hard and I literally had to self talk my way out of it.
 By the time I got home I was so hungry and dinner was in another hour. I ate dinner, it was another healthy meal, was so good! An hour passed and I started to get my nightly sweet/salty tooth. Ugh how I hate this tooth!! I had to eat something so I chose a special k crisp, 100 calories yes! Was yummy!! I few hours passed and then came the salty tooth kicking in and I just wanted those dam chips. Well what goes better with chips than a bologna sandwich, right? So I made a sandwich, oh did I forget that peanut butter sandwich I ate earlier,(I actually stole it from my wife she had made it for herself and I walked by her and said yum that looks good can I have one? So she gave me hers) oh yeah I did forget to mention that :/ It was apart of my sweet tooth munch! Back to the salty tooth munch, I ate it and after I felt like crap and headed off to bed.
I woke up this morning early after a terrible night sleep and felt like crap. Why does this happen?? The food is worse than any other drug out there I swear! I need to be in a rehab lol. So today I will make my plan and follow through and each day reach out to my support people in my life. I cant let all the hard work be in vein. I workout so hard and have no results to show for it. I need to get my food on track like my training is.
So onto a new week!!

My workouts this past week:
7.346 miles ran
2 days Jillian shred dvd
1 day Aerobic body shaping dvd
1 day Jiggle free abs dvd
2 rest days :) after 31 days straight workouts I needed it!

My inspiration for this coming week:

Self Sabotage!

 

This past week has been an adventure for sure. I have had laughs, heartache, and feeling the blues. What does this do to the mind? Well let me count the Twinkies!

When I get into a funk or feeling happy I eat, then comes the point of dam I have to get this under control weigh-in is coming up. This week I did have a loss, it was .4th of a lb. This is not what a person who works out an hour a day should lose. I should have been at goal by September but since I have pissed away the days with food set backs, I will not make my goal. So I have set a new goal for Dec 31st 2013. I will be at goal!

How can I do this? Simple fact is, I have to get out of my own way! I cant always say, ok I can have that treat, its your birthday after all. I can have that treat I worked out hard today. I can eat that because I'm so pissed of at you, I will show you. I can eat that because I'm craving something sweet. the list goes on and on with all these mind games we play with ourselves, justifying why we are allowed to eat these foods. I need to get rid of the excuses and get moving forward to the person I want to be.

I'm an emotional eater and I have to learn my triggers and instead of eating my feelings, try to use the skills I have learned and self talk my way out of it.

My workouts for this week:
7 miles running ( 1 mile a day)
7 days Jillian shred dvd

My inspiration for this week:

ME MYSELF AND I!!!

Do it for you!

I'm so happy to say I had a loss this week! 2.2 lbs.!! It was a long time waiting but I did it. Or should I say my body did it :)

I had to push pass a lot of mental barriers this week, like my eating. Eating is the most hardest part of weight loss. I have to say I did indulge a few times but I kept it minimal and didn't have a whole cheat day just a few treats and that seemed to make all the difference. I have to learn not to rely on exercise to cover what I have eaten, but to eat so I can exercise. I found that out the other day when I thought I was going to eat a big breakfast and then do a workout. I kept saying to myself dam what is wrong with my legs I cant run long. Not knowing what I had eaten made me sluggish and not preform to my bodies full potential. Lesson learned! I have been sticking to a small breakfast, then eat right after my workout to refuel, seems to work for my body and recovery time is quick. I feel awesome right now and I don't want this to end :)

 I would tell my self if I did the extra work, soon my body would give in and start doing what I wanted it to do. I didn't give up and I did it for me!
I love the way the exercising has made me feel, better mood, stronger both mentally and physically. I cant say it enough, push past those mental barriers, it is worth it!

So this week I accomplished:

12 miles of running
7 days of Jillian dvd shred

My inspiration for this week:

 

When it’s time to die, let us not discover that we have never lived.

— Henry David Thoreau

Dont eat back calories!

Today was my weigh in day and I wasn't pleased, but who am I kidding if you don't eat right this is what happens!
I was up again, for the past few week as I try to tweak my diet , I have failed to keep to it. I just cant seem to get with the program. :/ I have worked my ass of at working out but I'm not working my ass of in the eating department. I workout at least 1 1/2 hrs. a day only to ruin it with bad food choices is something I really need to keep a eye on. I'm my worst enemy when it comes to this. I give in to temptation and cravings and then feel bad because the scale says what I try and hide. The scale doesn't lie!
Food is one of my most hardest parts to weight loss, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels this way. I always wake up and start my day off right only to ruin it after dinner time. Why is this? I have for years tried to figure this out. I also have times when I'm with family or friends and I'm like what ever, I will eat out of not wanting to get any one upset. I really need to work on this and be more aware of what is good for me and not for others.
My half way point has come and gone and I'm no where near where I had planned to be, but I wont give up! I'm going to do this I will get healthy and I know it is going to come from inside and I have to dig down deep and figure out my boobie traps and not lead myself into self sabotage.
So my plan for the next 30 days is to eat clean again, this seems to be the only time I can get my diet right and lose the lbs. So its a tried and true method for me. I have a few b-day parties coming up so I will have to make plans to brig foods I can eat.
Make a plan or plan to fail that is the answer!

My inspiration for this week:
I'M WORTH IT!!

Trust the process!

I have to trust this process of new eating and working out. This is hard when the scale starts creeping up the wrong way. I have worked out like never before and I ended up gaining a few lbs. I know that this always happens when you start something new with your body. My mind says that but man sometimes you just feel like giving up. I have to learn to trust that my body is just trying to figure out what to do with itself, and to be honest with the foods I put in it. No matter how much you exercise if the food intake doesn't match the amount of exercise you do you will never get any where!

So I will trust this process and give it my all. I have a plan, and goal in place and the determination to get there. I will not give up because of what the scale said.

Today was my monthly measurement day and it went ok, I lost 1/2 in on my waist, 1/2 in on  my hips. All the other body parts stayed the same. I wasn't to pleased because of the amount of working out I've been doing but I have to remember that with the loss of fat and the gain of muscle my body is changing and I do feel that with my clothes. Again I have to trust the process!

The exercise I did this past week:
Ran 10 miles total
Jillian shred dvd 7x
1020 squats
675 crunches
555 seconds of planks
555 triceps push ups

Was hard but I did it! Onto a new week, I will trust my body will conform and do what I need it to do. I have to stick to the plan and know one day I will succeed.

                                              My inspiration for this week:

Got the UMPH!

The last few weeks have been all trials and errors as I try to get into my grove of getting healthy. It is a everyday battle, wait! who am I kidding, it is a every second of the day battle. I battle the urge to eat bad things, I battle the umph to get up off the couch and bust out a workout, I battle when a loved one offers me bad things, it is hard and some times I just give in.

As I was watching my fav show, I was in awe of the progress he was making, but noticed in his eyes he looked weak. Well just as I predicted he was cutting corners and not eating well. His Dr. said he was malnourished. I was surprised at that, you can be malnourished and still over weight. This happens when you cut corners and starve yourself, thinking it will help you lose faster. I have come to understand this just isn't the way to go. You can kill yourself by this and that price just isn't worth it!

So as I go in to another week of tweaking my diet and workout routine, I will be conscious of what my body feels like when I eat and when I work out. I will not be so fixated n the scale but how I feel. I have be to compulsive about that scale, I will keep logging my weight every week but I wont get side tracked on what it says. Getting in touch with why I do things is key.

                           So I got my UMPH and I'm going to Gitterdone!

                                          My inspiration for this week:

If it is broke fix it!

 

Can you believe we are half way through the month?!

It has been a month of struggles for me, cookouts, birthdays, and all of life's events. It is so hard to stay on track when ice cream season is in full effect.

With summer time comes new shows on t.v. and one that hit me in the face was Extreme Makeover. I just love this show. Though I'm not over 400 lbs. I have many traits of the people I see on the show. Every day struggles are all around us in this big old USA. We as a nation keep getting bigger and bigger and we allow it. We are just letting each other kill ourselves. Killing ourselves with our forks. Is it bad to keep each other accountable? Some say yes it is my business and I don't care how much I weigh. But I don't think that way. I think man I love this person enough to say get on track, I want you here as long as you can be. I think if it is said in a loving way we all would be in such a better place.

I praise my sister and wife for always keeping me on track and vise versa. Everyone needs that support system to keep them accountable for their well being. Its not out of vanity it is out of love.

So as I was saying this show sparked a new flame in me, one I haven't felt in a while. I was at my ends rope again for the thousandth time and wanted to give up and claim I was forever fat! Then I watched these transformations and said dam if someone 400+ lbs. can do it what the hell am I complaining about 50 lbs.? So I friended Chris on F.B. and heard about his book, I ordered it and read the whole thing with in 2 days. I made a plan for myself and with a few slip ups I've been doing good. I will have to keep tweaking it and making it my own but he gave me the foundation to do it. I will succeed this year in losing these lbs.! 

With a new fire lit here I go :)    

Big Secret to life...

I just love this quote from Oprah! It made me think, wow, this is so true! I'm always looking for the almighty secret to weight loss. Well honey there is only one and it is to get off your ass and work, close that fridge and mouth and all will fall into place.
Now tell my mind that and all will be A OK hahaha!

For the past few weeks I have had little weight losses. 1/2 lb here, 1/2 lb there. But I keep telling myself in the end it adds up. I'm proud to say I'm not discouraged and the fire is still burning, slow and steady. I WILL NOT give up!

My last 2 challenges was hard but I was so happy that I completed it. I made it clear to myself the only one in my way is me. I don't know what it is that stops me some days, but I'm working every second of every minute of every day to find out more about why I do the things I do. I may never figure it out but I will never give up on me.

My food intake is still going good, few treats here and there but I always keep myself in check. I try my hardest to get whole, organic foods. It is costly but like I have read so many times before, so is the E.R. when your body breaks down from all the chemicals in the foods out there. So I will pay the price to eat well. I have found if you shop in season and buy wisely, like using coupons, it isn't to bad on the wallet.

This last month has been a big eye opener for me, I was in the E.R. with a severe asthma attache and almost died. It made me reevaluate what I want out of life. I don't ever want to feel that helpless again. I pride myself on being a strong woman and try to inspire others. I need to step back and do that for myself. Lately I have been doing just that. I take baths with meditation music, I workout every day, I quit smoking, I eat good foods. I feel the best I have in years! No turning back for me NO WAY!

Wake up!

Well I'm up 1.6 lbs this week :(

I'm not happy with myself at all!!

I made not so good choices and most of them was because I was full of emotions and I ate to comfort myself. I was like on auto zone and didn't even care what the outcome was. As always 2 days before I knew I had to weigh-in I tried to make better food choices. I know this happens all the time. The day of weigh-in usually I eat a little more than I should, saying to myself, its OK I have 6 more days to work it off. Then comes the 2nd day and I usually make one of several to do list and the goals I want to accomplish for the week. I read articles about weight loss, look to see if there is new diets I can try, all the things that I know I already did the week before. Then I usually hit the weekend not giving a hoot and drink and eat things I shouldn't. I self medicate with food because that's what my brain has been hot wired to do. By the time Monday hits I say dam I have 2 days until weigh-in I better get with it. The vicious cycle continues.

I need to break away from these vices. I have to just except the people in my life that cause me stress need not be in it. No matter how much pain I am in because of it I have faith all things will be as it should.

With all this said I will make an effort this week to really look at myself and figure out why I jump to food every time I have a issue.

 I will use my support system and get back to working toward my goal. I slipped but I will not fall!!

So onto a new week, with new eyes.

 

Here is my inspiration for this week:

 

Make no excuses!

This week I'm down only .4th of a lb but that's just fine, I make no excuses! I'm going in the right direction.
I have to take it one minute at a time, one meal at a time, one exercise at a time.

This past week I added in a few new foods, one is a new fav! I was watching Dr. Oz show and his daughter was making one of her recipes from her new book, Relish, it had sweet peppered jelly. Dr Oz made the comment that this would help rev up metabolism, so of course I ran to store and tried it out. Well it was the BOMB!! I fell in love with the spicy sweet kick! I suggest you go out and find yeah some! I bought the one from my home state of Michigan, got to keep the growers around here supported :)

5 things I learned this week:

1) Eat clean as much as possible but have a treat or 2. In the past it was a all or nothing mentality, I now know this will lead to doom!

2) Ask for help when you need it. Ive always been a private person and full of pride, some days you just have to humble yourself and say HELP!

3) Have fun when working out. I have been having a great time with my challenge group, with the help of them and my wife exercise has been so fun this past week!

4) Knowledge is power! If you limit yourself to one style of eating, etc, you limit your possibilities to be your best you!

5) To be the best me and be there for my family, I have to put myself first. I have spent many of years tending to others, it wasn't until my wife said put you first, no one is going any where without you, then I really started focusing on me and now learning what I'm about. (thank you my love)

So here is my inspiration

Weekly head check!

 

Another week pass and I finally had a loss :)

It was only a pound and I know I could have done better. I just have to take this one day at a time. I find myself putting so much pressure on myself to always have good food choices. This in turn makes me rebel in a way and eat things I shouldn't. I have to find a balance in myself and in turn this will help me make better choices when it comes to food.

What I have learned this past week:

1) No matter how many times I fail I have the choice to turn it around

I don't have to give up every time I have a slip!

2) Having a support system is key

I feel my best when I'm challenged to do my best

3) I have the inner strength to do an thing I put my mind to

Setting goals keeps me moving forward

 

I'm on a life long journey and I have to just be OK with that. I'm not those women who eat what they want and don't exercise. I have to be OK with that. I'm never going to have this skin gone after all this weight loss. I have to be OK with that. I have to be proud of my "OWN" accomplishments and rejoice in them.

So onto a new week, new goals, new challenges :)

 

Get back on track!

It has been a long time since I wrote in this blog, so I thought I should start again. This has been a trait I need to change. These are tools to use to lose weight and again I'm not using my tools. I also wanted to start taking pics of myself every 10 lbs I lose, again another tool I will use. I made a page in this blog dedicated to this, tab at top of blog page.

I want to get back on track, I feel off the wagon for a minute gained weight the past 2 weeks, time to get control and get back in charge! In order to keep to my goal, I need to get with it. I'm losing time and I cant get that back. I don't want to have a few months pass and realize I'm in the same place. I want to progress!
So for now on I will blog weekly and keep track of my progress through pictures. I will use the tools that are out there and really use them. Not just admire everyone Else's progress and grand after photos.

                       My challenge for this next week is to not eat after 8pm. 

Day 30 last day clean eating (tues)

Day 30!

 

I made it to day 30! Not like I was an angel though, I cheated a handful of times, nibble her nibble there, but it does add up. I didn't feel all that good about the cheats but I'm OK over all with the past 30 days. So my last day went good I managed to do the whole day clean.

I did Jillian's DVD today was another killer workout! That is # 2 workout for this week :)

Things I learned the past month:

1. I'm very Moody when it comes to food

2. I know how to say NO

3. I like feeling good about myself and my accomplishments

4. I can do anything I put my mind to

5. I will put me first because without that I'm no good to others

6. I love how good foods give me have energy

7. I hate how bad foods make my tummy feel bloated and sick

8. Funny but I enjoy having regular BM's lol

9. I love that I can eat lots and lose weight

10. I'm worth being happy!

 

Here is some inspiration:

 

 

Day 29 Clean eating (mon)

Day 29

 

What a day this has been!

In the A.M. every weekday I get kids up and going for school, come home get brother up and going with his stuff, then do this and that before you know it I haven't eaten or exercised! I always put myself last, well not today my friends!

I took kids to school, quickly took care of brothers needs, talked to my councilor and I looked at the clock and dang the a.m. was almost over, I could have walked away and said no time, but I didn't!

I had some issues getting things started but I managed to squeeze in a good workout. I started a DVD from Jillian and dang I was sweaty and sore on my first  workout lol.

I was proud of myself that I didn't make excuses, I buckled down and did it and after I did I felt awesome, sore but awesome non the less!

So the comes the eating equation of this day. I can say it was another daunting day, I hate when my brain starts slipping into old habits. I've made a conscious decision to change this and everyday I make progress. Today was hard because I just didn't feel like eating healthy, but I did. I didn't feel like exercising, but I did. Its all a journey to self.

So here is what was on my menu for today:

Breakfast:

protein drink made w/rice milk

Lunch:

chicken

salad

Dinner:

 

no this wasn't to clean but had only a few bites of it:

(got take out to bring home)

chicken,Cole slaw, baked beans, biscuit, mashed potato

 

So the night was a bust of sorts but not feeling all to bad I only had a few bites and I found out something, good food taste better when its fresh and not processed!

 

Here is my verse for today because I DO love myself :)

 

 

Day 27 & 28 clean eating (weekend)

Day 27 & 28

 

The weekend is here and with it many choices to be good or just cave in, well this weekend I had a few challenges.

Its seems to me that the closer  get to the end of this the more I want to be defiant. I'm not sure why but I'm sure there is some psychoanalytical reason why? I just haven't found this out yet or else I wouldn't have a weight issue.

So sat I stayed OK until lunch I ended going out with family, good intentions, yeah right, the moment I stepped foot in a Mexican place and smelled all the smells I wanted to eat!

I made it through the rest with nibbles of bad here and there. This being my last weekend I kind of, in a weird way, gave myself permission to cheat. I was explaining it away in my head to justify this nibble that nibble. In the end I just know this demon is a big one and no matter how you think you are going to conquer it, it always comes back and gets yeah! This is by far a mental illness problem, why else would someone talk them selves out of eating? Eating has become a social thing and its hard not to gather and socialize over yummy foods. There is no way around food, we need it to live, to survive. Now to learn to eat to live not live to eat!

 

So with that said here is my weekends menu:

Sat day 27

Breakfast:

skipped

Lunch:

1/4th of burrito was hard on tummy :(

chips and salsa w/avocado

Dr. pepper

Dinner:

1/4th left over again my stomach turned and I wouldn't eat it

weird right! Tells me my stomach now has limits

Snack:

nuts

Sun day 28

Breakfast:

protein drink made w/rice milk

lunch:

chicken

salad

Dinner:

rice pasta w/ red Turkey sauce

salad

beans

Snack:

Cinnamon roll :( was looking at me hard!

 

Here is a verse for this weekend:

 

Day 26 Clean eating NOT (fri)

Day 26

 

Today is Friday, yeah TGIF!!! But also it is the birthday of my wonderful wife. So of course I have tons of plans I want to make sure happen without a hitch. I was on stress level 1000%! I had a wonderful day planned of presents throughout the whole day. Well my plans did go right, all fell into place.

The only thing that was off was my eating! It was all over the board today. As I said in the blog 25 I didn't plan or create a way to fend of bad choices. In the a.m. I was so hungry, and that was because the day before I just didn't eat enough. I ended up paying for it today with low blood sugars and a head hurting. So here is what was on the menu for today:

Breakfast:

MISSED

Lunch:

fast food fish

1/2 Fri

5 sips of soda

Dinner:

chicken thigh

potato

corn

Snack:

birthday cake 1 1/2 pieces

:(

handful of nuts

 

I was disappointed at myself today but know what i wont beat myself up for it, tomorrows a new day!

 

Bible verse for today:

 

 

Day 25 Clean eating (thurs)

Day 25

 

Times have come and change is near and that's when I usually slip back into my old ways of thinking. When it comes to food that is. So today was a challenge, I started having cravings today, looking back over the day I think it was because I let my self get to hungry. That's when bad things happen of course. So with that said here is what was on my menu today:

Breakfast:

Protein drink made with chocolate coconut milk

Lunch:

Chicken avocado salad

but only ate a small part of it I was running behind because of all the places I had to be that day.

Dinner:

Chicken nuggets (home made)

salad

Snack:

nuts, berries

 

So lesson today don't let your self get to hungry and next blog I will explain why!

 

My inspiration for today:

 

 

Day 24 Clean eating (wed)

Day 24

 

It's weigh-in day!

Drum roll please........

2 lbs down this week!!

 

So today was another busy day, had to shovel, which I used as a form of exercise. I crouched and used different body parts to make it a good workout. Man last night I sure felt it, I was sore and in need of a major rub down! But I have to say I felt good and it gave me the energy I needed to finish my day strong.

Food cravings are still there but I have control this week so that's all good. I have 7 days left until the end of this cleanse so I'm super happy about that! I will, how ever, be eating clean 90% of the time after that until I hit my goal weight. This IS the year, I've spent to many years saying this and not completing it. I will not be ruled by fat!

So here is what was on the menu for today:

Breakfast:

protein drink made w/rice milk

Lunch:

chicken strips

avocado salad

Dinner:

bison tacos

beans 

Snack

berries, nuts

 

My verse for today:

 

Day 23 Clean eating (tues)

Day 23

 

Wow I cant believe I have just 7 days left before this clean eating is done. Now with that said, I have to say, I have really enjoyed not having belly aches daily.

 I don't how ever like the fact I had to give up some of my favorite things to eat.

I noticed since eating clean how much garbage my family eats, and I miss that also. I miss eating mindlessly and enjoying foods with my kids and grand kids. But I often remind myself these things are not what counts.

 What counts is being there a long time for my family. What counts is them being able to have me in their lives at times when they need me. I remind myself of the people that have died in my life that didn't think like this and how I would have loved them in my life to meet my grand kids, to share family functions with. But they didn't and the out come is and always will be death!

So it IS up to me to change, no one can do this for me. I can bitch and moan how hard it is, but who did this? I did this! I ate the foods that I knew was bad for me. I didn't exercise because I felt it was to hard on my body, not realizing when I don't care for my body that is what will do me in, not a little foods restriction or exercise.

 I'm happy and pleased to know for the past several weeks I have had losses and no gains! I'm on the road to where I want to be and I just feel, and know I will make it there.

 

Here is what was on my menu for this day:

Breakfast:

protein drink made w/rice milk

Lunch:

chicken strips

avocado salad

Dinner:

chicken thigh

salad

mixed berries

Snack:

clean chocolate(found at health store YUMMY) w/almonds

 

My verse for today:

One of my all time favs!!

 

Day 22 clean eating (mon)

Day 22

Felt like I just wanted to throw in the towel and surcome to being fat!

I hate days like this, but I had come across this pic on a friends site and said to myself, yeah I'm not going down without a fight!

This evil demon called fat will not conquer me, no it wont!

I went and bought a new pair of running shoes and a new DVD. I will start training for something Ive  thought I couldn't do anymore, and that is to run! Run like the wind and be free, o man how I have missed it!

So I will make this, I know I will. I just got to keep my focus and stop putting me last.

Here is what was on my menu for today:

Breakfast:

protein drink made with rice milk

Lunch:

chicken nuggets w/honey

avocado salad

Dinner:

broasted chicken and mixed warm veggies

Snack:

rice chips and guacamole

 

Here is my verse for today:

 

Day 20 & 21 clean eating.... Weekend!

Day 20 & 21

 

This weekend was by far fast and furious! I had made a bad move going to a asian buffet! I thought, in my heart and mind, I would be ok and make good choices. I made it all the way to the end and wham!

The chicken nugget and onion ring called my name! I swear! Not, I just had one of each but after I ate it I was reminded real quick why I shouldn't eat that junk.
I went home and that night I woke up with the worse stomach pains ever! I ended up being sick for 2 days because of one poor choice. Was it worth it? No!
So I know I messed up my 30 day stretch with only 10 days remanding, can you say self-sabotage! I guess in my sub conscious I made myself fail, I always do for some weird unexplained reason. I really need to find the root to this issue, or I'm bound to repeat it.
Here is what was on my menu for the weekend:
Breakfast: both days had protein drink made with rice milk
Lunches: chicken and salad
Dinner on sat: Asian foods :/
Dinner on Sunday: chicken nuggets and avocado salad

Here is my verse for this weekend!

 

Day 19 Clean eating (fri)

Day 19

 

TGIF is all I got to say, man this was one hell of a long week, between snow days, half days, this and that to keep every ones schedule going and in tact is a full time job.

So today I did OK in eating but I had a sweet tooth to die for.

So here is what is on my menu for today:

 

Breakfast:

protein drink made w/ almond milk

Lunch:

chicken

side salad

Dinner:

chicken

rice tortilla

salsa

Snack

rice cream

chocolate almond milk

cashews

made a great frozen treat yummy!

 

Here is my verse for today:

 

Day 18 clean eating (thurs)

Day 18

 

Today was another faced pace day. I didn't plan right and ended up skipping a meal.

I was going from 6:30 am until midnight with no down time it seamed. I often wonder how I pull it off.  So  I don't have much to say for this day but it was a whirl wind.

 

On my menu for today

Breakfast:

protein drink w/coconut milk

Lunch:

Nada

Dinner:

chicken with rice

Snack:

nuts

 

 

My verse for today: