Wednesday, June 27, 2012
I have made excuses all my life, be it for me or someone I love.
Its funny some days when I get these light-balb moments! I know that I have to be the one who changes. I get mad some days wen I get told, do this, do that, and guess who I take it out on? ME!! I eat wat ever dont exercise and I wonder why I dont lose weight? I know why I dont lose, its a matter of getting te "want" back.
In earlier blogs Ive writted all about sabotage and what I need to do. I just cant seem to have te "want". Today I woke up and talked to my mom, she was letting me know my sister had a great time (as in tick tock time) running a 5k yesterday. One second I'm feeling so happy for her then in the next moment I was jealous. As most of you know I suffer from Fobro and its taking its toll on me mentally and physically. I so bad to do those tings, I want to run and be free ( in my head when I run), I love to run and exercise, oh how I miss it.
So I need to get in gear, last few days I just ave been in the "I dont give a flip" mode. I looked at the calendar and realized the challenge myself and my sister have is almost done! Next wed we are to weigh-in and see wo won, I know already it wasnt me! I have even gained, Im so dissapointed in myself!
I have to start putting me first, I always put others in front of ME! So no more excuses lets kick some ass this week Shawn!!
Posted by shawn duncan at Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Friday, June 22, 2012
Its been a long time coming and I need to get with the program. I just cant seem to have the want to lose this weight.
Last night I even dreamed of how great it felt to lose weight and ware nice clothes. I just want to be the old me, care free and with a big smile all the time.
As the days pass I feel more and more heavy, not just in weight but also in my spirit. I want to regain the fight I once had and not go down this path every week.
Every wed. I weigh-in and jot down my weight in my book, that's if I feel like it. Then I get so upset at another wasted week gone and no real loss of weight, I have never completed a whole week on a diet or any plan for that matter. I just cant seem to follow through. But that seems to be the story of my life, never complete a dang gone thing!
So what should I do? I hate this feeling of just not caring but also caring, know what I mean? I care that I need to lose weight, but I don't care to give up my favorite foods.
Funny thing is a lot of my favorite foods are now becoming my tummies worse enemy, by that I mean my stomach cant handle to much fried foods or spicy so it takes a lot of things that once was my trigger foods to now not. But the downside to this is I have become more apt to eat sweats instead. I love love love sweats oh yeah did I say I LOVE SWEATS! I adore the way they make my mouth sing!
I always hear it doesn't taste as good as skinny but I tell you its been a long time since I've been skinny and not to long ago I tasted sweats, so in my minds eye there is no contest here in the short term of thing. I need to make it to skinny so I know how that taste, he-he!
So again I'm back on this journey, I will try to write daily :)
Peace Love Joy
Posted by shawn duncan at Friday, June 22, 2012